those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
