The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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