she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
