Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
