drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
