She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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