My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Do vagina's smell?
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
