you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
