You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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