I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Randomize
