I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
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