She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
