Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Randomize
