is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
my poor anus
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Randomize
