Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
