You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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