the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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