i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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