i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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