real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
