I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
