He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize