This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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