I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Randomize