If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Randomize
