hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Im just a social blackout drinker.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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