I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Randomize
