I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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