What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize