Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
