So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
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