Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
