There is no way he is gay with that hair.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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