I think I just saw someone hide a body.
please come you make the beer taste better
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Why is there bacon in the couch?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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