I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
