i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
