somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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