I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Randomize
