I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
