Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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