That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize