i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
the gays at disneyland are vicious
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
