Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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