I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
