yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
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