Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
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