I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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