I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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