margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
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