She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
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